This informal CPD article, ‘The Importance of Self-Regulation for Autistic Adults: A Neurodiversity-Affirming Perspective’, was provided by Yasmeen Alqallaf at Yasmeen Center, a Special Needs Training and Consultancy based in Kuwait.
Introduction
Self-regulation — the capacity to manage one’s emotional responses, cognitive processes, sensory input, and behaviours — is a critical life skill. For neurotypical adults, it is often taken for granted, shaped invisibly by cultural norms, developmental milestones, and social expectations. But for autistic adults, self-regulation is not just a soft skill; it is often a hard-won survival tool, carefully crafted over years of navigating a world that misunderstands and often punishes their natural ways of being.
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is characterized by differences in social communication, sensory processing, and restricted or repetitive patterns of behaviour. Importantly, through the neurodiversity lens, these are not deficits to be “fixed” but natural variations in how human brains function. Yet, even in the most affirming environments, autistic adults face daily challenges: from sensory overload in noisy public spaces, to executive functioning difficulties at work, to the chronic exhaustion of masking — camouflaging autistic traits to fit neurotypical norms (Hull et al., 2017).
This article will explore why self-regulation is so essential for autistic adults. Drawing on lived experiences — including those of Temple Grandin, one of the world’s most renowned autistic thinkers — and backed by recent scientific research, we will examine:
- What self-regulation means in the context of autism.
- Why it matters across sensory, emotional, and cognitive domains.
- How autistic adults develop, adapt, and struggle with self-regulation.
- What strategies and supports can empower autistic adults to thrive.
Our goal is not to frame autistic self-regulation as a path to conformity but as a means of fostering autonomy, dignity, and well-being.
Why Autistic Adults Face Unique Self-Regulation Challenges
To understand the importance of self-regulation, we must first unpack the unique pressures autistic adults face. These go far beyond the childhood challenges often spotlighted in public discourse.
Sensory Processing Differences
Autistic individuals experience the sensory world differently. Temple Grandin describes, in Thinking in Pictures (1995), how certain sounds, lights, and textures could overwhelm her as a child:
“A sudden loud noise hurt my ears like a dentist’s drill hitting a nerve.”
This heightened sensitivity does not disappear in adulthood. Autistic adults may struggle with:
- Loud environments (offices, public transport).
- Visual overstimulation (fluorescent lights, cluttered spaces).
- Textural irritations (clothing, food textures).
- Olfactory sensitivities (perfumes, cleaning chemicals).
Without tools to regulate these sensory inputs, autistic adults can experience meltdowns (emotional outbursts), shutdowns (withdrawal or dissociation), or chronic stress.
Social and Emotional Masking
Many autistic adults engage in masking — suppressing stimming, forcing eye contact, mimicking social behaviours — to fit neurotypical expectations. Hull et al. (2017) highlight that while masking can improve short-term social acceptance, it comes at a high cost:
- Emotional exhaustion.
- Increased anxiety and depression.
- Loss of self-identity.
Self-regulation, in this context, becomes a balancing act: how to navigate social demands without burning out or losing oneself.
Executive Functioning Challenges
Executive functioning refers to a set of cognitive processes, including:
- Working memory.
- Flexible thinking.
- Self-monitoring.
- Task initiation and completion.
Demetriou et al. (2018) found that many autistic individuals experience executive functioning difficulties, which can make planning, organizing, and transitioning between tasks overwhelming. Without external supports or adapted strategies, autistic adults may be misperceived as lazy or disorganized, when in fact they are battling cognitive overload.
Autistic Burnout
Perhaps the most urgent reason for supporting self-regulation is to prevent autistic burnout. Raymaker et al. (2020) define autistic burnout as a state of physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion, often following prolonged periods of stress, masking, and unmet support needs. Unlike general stress or burnout, autistic burnout can lead to:
- Temporary loss of skills (e.g., speech, executive function).
- Heightened sensory sensitivities.
- Mental health crises.
Recovery from autistic burnout can take months or even years, underscoring the critical need for daily self-regulatory practices.
Vivid lens into autistic self-regulation
Insights from Temple Grandin
Temple Grandin’s life story offers a vivid lens into autistic self-regulation. In The Autistic Brain (2013), she writes:
“When you’re autistic, you have to learn how to stretch yourself without breaking yourself.”
Grandin emphasizes that success, for her, was not about eliminating autistic traits but about learning how to work with them. For example:
- She built a squeeze machine, modeled on cattle chutes, to provide deep pressure and calm her nervous system.
- She structured her days around predictable routines and focused intensely on her specialized interests (animals, engineering).
- She advocated for environmental modifications (quiet workspaces, clear instructions) rather than expecting herself to simply “tough it out.”
Importantly, Grandin resists the framing of autism as purely a deficit. In Thinking in Pictures, she explains:
“I am a visual thinker, not a language-based thinker.”
Her sensory experiences, her thinking style, and even her emotional patterns are not “wrong” — they are simply different. Self-regulation, in this context, means respecting and harnessing these differences, not erasing them.
Research-Backed Self-Regulation Strategies
Drawing from both Grandin’s insights and contemporary research, we can outline several key areas where autistic adults benefit from intentional self-regulation strategies.
1. Sensory Regulation
Schaaf and Mailloux (2015), in their guide to sensory integration, emphasize that adults — not just children — need sensory accommodations. Effective strategies include:
- Noise-canceling headphones or earplugs.
- Sunglasses or hats for light sensitivity.
- Fidget objects or stim tools.
- Access to quiet, low-stimulation spaces.
Workplaces and public environments must be educated to understand that these are not “special favors” but essential supports.
2. Emotional Self-Regulation
Mindfulness practices, adapted for autistic needs, can help. While some traditional mindfulness exercises (like body scans) may increase discomfort, alternatives include:
- Focusing on a single sensory input (e.g., a calming texture or sound).
- Engaging in rhythmic breathing.
- Practicing guided imagery centered on special interests or positive memories.
Crucially, emotional regulation is supported not just by individual effort but by relational safety: knowing that one’s authentic expressions are accepted.
3. Cognitive and Executive Support
To manage planning and organization, autistic adults often benefit from:
- Visual schedules and checklists.
- Breaking large tasks into smaller, concrete steps.
- Using timers or reminders.
- Structured routines with built-in flexibility.
These tools externalize executive functions, reducing cognitive load.
4. Structured Downtime
Preventing burnout requires not just rest but intentional, protected downtime:
- Time spent engaging in special interests without guilt.
- Opportunities for movement-based stimming.
- Avoiding overcommitment to social or work demands.
This is not laziness or avoidance; it is preventive care.
5. Community and Advocacy
Self-regulation is not just an individual burden. Families, friends, colleagues, and communities must:
- Normalize autistic needs (e.g., allowing stimming in public).
- Offer accommodations without requiring disclosure.
- Advocate for sensory-friendly spaces and policies.
As the neurodiversity movement teaches, the problem is often not the autistic individual but the inflexible systems around them.
The Philosophical Heart: Self-Regulation and Identity
At its core, self-regulation is about agency. It is the power to shape one’s own life, to balance challenge and rest, to honor one’s nature.
Temple Grandin captures this beautifully when she writes:
“I think using my autism is like using a gift, a strong force. It can build, it can help, or it can overwhelm. You have to know how to use it.”
For too long, self-regulation in autism has been framed through a compliance lens: teaching people to appear “normal” or suppress behaviours. But true self-regulation, in a neurodiversity-affirming model, is about equipping individuals to navigate the world without compromising who they are.
This shift has profound implications:
- It challenges therapies and interventions that prioritize surface-level behavioural change over well-being.
- It reframes accommodations not as special treatment but as human rights.
- It empowers autistic adults to define their own goals, their own balance, their own rhythms.
Conclusion
Self-regulation is not optional for autistic adults — it is essential. It spans sensory, emotional, cognitive, and social domains, allowing individuals to navigate a world that often fails to meet their needs.
Drawing on the insights of Temple Grandin and supported by a growing body of research, we see that effective self-regulation:
- Honors difference.
- Promotes autonomy.
- Prevents burnout.
- Builds resilience.
As a society, we have a collective responsibility to support autistic adults in this work — not by forcing them to mask or conform, but by reshaping environments, expectations, and attitudes.
In the words of Grandin:
“The world needs all kinds of minds.”
Let us ensure those minds have the tools, space, and respect they need to thrive.
We hope this article was helpful. For more information from Yasmeen Center, please visit their CPD Member Directory page. Alternatively, you can go to the CPD Industry Hubs for more articles, courses and events relevant to your Continuing Professional Development requirements.
References
- Demetriou, E. A., Lampit, A., Quintana, D. S., Naismith, S. L., Song, Y. J. C., Pye, J. E., Hickie, I. B., & Guastella, A. J. (2018). Autism spectrum disorders: A meta-analysis of executive function. Molecular Psychiatry, 23(5), 1198–1204.
- Grandin, T. (1995). Thinking in Pictures: My Life with Autism. Vintage.
- Grandin, T., & Panek, R. (2013). The Autistic Brain: Helping Different Kinds of Minds Succeed. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.
- Hull, L., Petrides, K. V., Allison, C., Smith, P., Baron-Cohen, S., Lai, M. C., & Mandy, W. (2017). “Putting on My Best Normal”: Social Camouflaging in Adults with Autism Spectrum Conditions. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 47, 2519–2534.
- Raymaker, D. M., Teo, A. R., Steckler, N. A., Lentz, B., Scharer, M., Delos Santos, A., Kapp, S. K., Hunter, M., Joyce, A., & Nicolaidis, C. (2020). “Having All of Your Internal Resources Exhausted Beyond Measure and Being Left with No Clean-Up Crew”: Defining Autistic Burnout. Autism in Adulthood, 2(2), 132–143.
- Schaaf, R. C., & Mailloux, Z. (2015). Clinician’s Guide for Implementing Ayres Sensory Integration: Promoting Participation for Children with Autism. American Occupational Therapy Association.
